So between the Royal baby, the Jessica Simpson baby and the Kimye baby - Baby Hope (B-Ho) hasn't got a chance. According to Kayne anyways. I feel like these celebs totally stole my thunder. And now that I am in sort of transition - I doubt my aspiring blogfame can even help us. Sorry about that B-Ho! Just an ordinary life for you.
Anyways - I've been thinking about this blog - a lot. I started Hope Squared to document my first year of marriage. After that - I continued blogging as a way to document our experiences. Our adventures. Our day to day. Somewhere along the way I got lost. Keeping up with this blog started to feel more of a commitment than a hobby. More than just a way to preserve our memories. I got caught up in the blog-hype. It's not surprising - it happens to me a lot.
And then - I got pregnant. And then I got morning, afternoon, evening and night sickness. And then I became narcoleptic. Falling asleep all.the.time. and my little blog I had been slowly investing so much time and energy (and even my hard earned dollars) in - just didn't seem as important. But I feel guilty. I let people down. And then I wonder - how did I ever let my little online journal ever get to that point? The point where I feel bad when I don't post something. When I don't return an e-mail. When I don't live up to my word. OK I should always feel bad when I don't live up to my word. But why should I feel ever guilty for abandoning my hobby? I don't want to ever look back on this blog and remind myself of how guilty I felt. I should want to look back and remember WOW Basil was fat!!! Or Man that Buffalo Chicken Grilled Cheese was outstanding!!!
And now - I feel like I am in some in between phase. Where I want to document my pregnancy experience - but still want to tell you about how much I miss drinking beer and how cute my cat is. Is my next destination to Mommy-Blog Ville? I suppose it's the natural progression from newlywed blogger to lifestyle blogger to mommy blogger, right? Maybe this is all part of the transition? I am not even sure what I am talking about. All I know - is that in six short months I am going to be someone's mom. And truthfully that is a lot to swallow. So I guess yes - I want to write about it. I want to remember how I felt during these changes. Because pregnancy isn't only filled with cute baby bumps and excuses to be taken care of by your partner - it's filled with a lot of other things too. A lot of things that aren't cute.
So I guess what that means is that Hope Squared's next journey will be to transform from a beer guzzling, cat loving, couch sitting, TV watching blogger into some sort of domestic woman that carries a baby and drinks the occasional beer while fearing the dreaded moment when the cat and baby interact and then blogs about it.